Skipping a Concert

Apparently normal people go out to concerts and movies and restaurants and public social things on a pretty regular basis.  At least, so we've heard.

It's a bit different for us.  One, finances are just a little tight.  We're very blessed, certainly--we eat regularly, we have a roof over our heads, and I don't have to worry this month about paying the light bill.  There are lots of people who can't say these things; we're very fortunate.  But if something major breaks on a car or something like that we'll have to shuffle some things around, and we kind of have to pick and choose the luxuries a little.  No complaints, but "going out" is not something we can affored to do on a frequent basis.

Two, I don't much enjoy crowds.  I'm almost pure introvert and, while I'm not at the level of neurotically avoiding social gatherings, they're not on my fun list.  I hear people on the radio getting excited about going to big concerts and meeting celebrities and people at church talking about these things like they're something to look forward to, and it just doesn't light my fire.  I get that extroverts are wired that way, but I have a hard time seeing things from their perspective.  So, no, I don't tend to seek out concerts.

Three, Adored Wife deals with chronic pain, and she has a limited amount of "up time" before she has to go lie down.  Otherwise, she probably WOULD enjoy concerts more.

So we don't do a lot of concerts.  But we had tickets to go see one because we'd given some money to a local charity and they were putting on a benefit concert.  We believe in the charity and consider it well worth supporting.  But it wasn't a band we were all that excited about--nothing wrong with them, we just weren't particular fans.  But we'd planned to go to the concert because, after all, we had tickets.  And I could have chosen to enjoy myself; I'm good at finding fun where fun is to be had.

But AW brought up that she wasn't interested enough in the band to spend her limited "up time" on them, and I hadn't been enthusiastic about it in the first place.  So we gave the tickets away to a local couple, and they enjoyed the concert.  We also had a gift certificate to a nearby steakhouse, so we went there and had an excellent meal and then walked around the mall a little until AW had exhausted her up time, and then we went home, very satisfied with the evening.

A good time was had by all.

Hope all's well out there, friends, and God bless.

Accustomed to Abnormal

I came up with a metaphor for my crazy life.

It goes like this.  I'm a terrible plumber.  I'm a halfway decent carpenter and I can do basic wiring and some other household maintenance odds and ends, but my plumbing jobs are usually stressful, expensive, and leaky.  I've just never had the knack for it.

So the other day when I replaced a sink faucet without too much trouble and it's no longer dripping and nothing appears to be leaking, I was caught a little off guard.  Honestly, it's not that I miss the drip, but it's an oddly buoyant feeling that it's not an issue any more.  I'm kind of weirded out; I don't know how to think about it.  I keep checking under the sink expecting a leak--it's like waiting for the other shoe to drop.  (This only relates to plumbing--I can swap out a light switch and not think about it any more.)

But it occurred to me sometime after the fact that this could be a metaphor for my family's life and the lives of a lot of people dealing with chronic health and personal issues.

What if everything were all of a sudden "normal" tomorrow?  What if Adored Wife and Social Hurricane were abruptly perfectly healthy, what if Basement Artist and I weren't dealing with our various psychological quirks (and, heck with it, what if my bad knee was okay) and what if Graphics Magician wasn't trying to survive adolescence AND middle school?

We wouldn't know what to do with ourselves.  It would be a complete change in our lives, one we weren't prepared for and wouldn't know how to handle.  We've had VERY difficult times in our lives here and there, when hoping for an uninterrupted night's sleep or fifteen peaceful minutes to sit down and decompress was wishful thinking.  Things aren't anywhere nearly that chaotic now, and I don't miss the really bad times, but you got accustomed to them.

What would it be like for you, friends, if you woke up tomorrow and things were "normal?"

Hope all's well out there, friends, and God bless.

Everybody Plays Charades

Happy Independence Day!

In this post, I elaborated on Adored Wife's anomic aphasia, her brain's occasional inability to come up with the correct word.  It's not a hugely impairing thing; probably 98% of the time the right term is there when she needs it.  It's just enough of an issue to be noticeable in conversation, and the family has gotten pretty good at figuring out what AW wants to say from her gestures and clues and "pointer words."

For instance, if she's trying to come up with "garage" and her mind isn't supplying it, she'll point toward it and say something like "where we keep the cars."  It works pretty well.  Or with the word "scissors" she'll act it out with her fingers, that sort of thing.

In conversation with her the other night I noted that the family had gotten pretty good at speaking her language, and she was quick to let me know that it wasn't just her family.  Her Sunday School class and the people at the community theater and a few neighbors (all of whom she spends significant time with) are pretty accustomed to deciphering her as well.

Everybody she knows reasonably well has learned to play charades.

And it got me to thinking about the whole idea of "normal," (as in "the neighbors think we're.....").  AW's friends and family have a relationship with her in which it's normal to have to sometimes guess at the word she wants.  And she's very happy to have friends who are willing to do that to have a conversation with her.

And I just wanted to express my appreciation to all of those who are willing to play along with those of us who aren't quite as normal as some.  Thanks for playing charades, friends.  That's just how we roll around here.